When Mercury Listens to the Moon

Long before I knew what Moon signs were about, I had noticed how frequently I ask those around me how they feel — and how often they instead tell me what they think.

This question is commonly met by some explanation of what’s happened recently, what that means, what they did (or didn’t do) about it, why it’s all their fault, why it’s all someone else’s fault, or why it’s actually incredibly complicated and everyone/no one is really to blame… with little mention of the feelings so obviously involved.

As we move into eclipse season and horoscopes advise us to ‘ground in our emotions’, I wanted to speak to the conflation of mental health and emotional health. Although they inevitably affect each other, they are distinct, and I’ve found astrology offers helpful language for parsing the two, and allows space for observing the important differences between what we feel and what we think.

In astrology, Mercury represents communication, it is the mind and the mouthpiece of our thoughts. They are the mythological messenger God, travelling between the Heavens and Earth; the psyche and the material world. They are clever, quick, cunning; a problem-solver, and a trickster who wins arguments through their cutting words as opposed to through physical force. They want the facts, the data, the receipts! Mercury likes to be right, and will perform all kinds of acrobatics to convince you it is — as to be wrong goes against its very purpose.

Meanwhile, the Moon is our emotions, but also feeling in the more literal sense. The Moon is what your gut tells you; your intuition, your reaction, it is at once intimate yet enigmatic. It is our relationship with care, both for ourselves and those we nurture. Fittingly tidal in its subtle and constant shifting, the Moon represents how our mood is interlinked with our experience of our body. The Moon isn’t concerned so much about what is objectively right or wrong, only that it gets to express itself and it is listened to.

A healthy dynamic between the two involves allowing time for the plight of the Moon to be heard, and acknowledging the feelings which have come up, before letting Mercury analyse the material situation, communicate this discomfort to others, or offer alternative perspectives to console it.

However, this balance can easily be disrupted when Mercury gets involved too quickly. If we rush to intellectualise a situation we will either be too overwhelmed to review the information accurately (and perpetuate our suffering in the long-term) or repress the feeling entirely.

And we need to feel. Feelings aren’t something to be eradicated in the pursuit of some truer, clearer version of reality — they are a necessary part of the functional whole. Being permeable and affected by this world is an inevitable part of existing in it! And to those who say they don’t feel anything, I invite you to consider that even indifference is an emotion.

The dominant paradigm in Western culture is a rationalist stance that assumes what is real is only that which can be observed and measured within the material world. It frames an objective reality in contrast to subjective meaning — our inner world, constituted by our personal circumstances, experiences, and conditioning — which is projected onto a universe that is otherwise void of meaning.

This in turn has led to a widespread solipsism which supposes that, if the individual is the only site of meaning-making, what meaning we project should serve to reinforce our sense of self.

A meaningless universe is a very appealing scapegoat to many, as it can be weaponised by those who already hold material power to dismiss and disempower those who speak out about their lived experience of suffering. It is a stance that denies accountability, because it can fall back on invalidating all negative emotional responses by saying: ‘but that’s not real’.

It really is the final-form of gaslighting.

I’ve always thought this was best illustrated by billionaire Elon Musk’s comments in 2022 to his (now divorced) spouse and mother to 2 of his children, Grimes, that he believed her to be part of a simulation generated by his own mind.

And while only a minority take this to such sociopathic extremes, because this hyper-rationalist narrative underlies all of Western culture, it affects us to varying degrees on a personal level too. We are often encouraged to dismiss and neutralise our negative emotional reactions as quickly as possible, lest we are seen to be acting irrationally. 

Especially so if our existence is in some way Othered to a white, cis-het, patriarchal power structure and aren’t afforded full authority over our own status as a subject.

But there is immense value in allowing yourself to experience your anger, your sadness, your pain, without seeking corrective action. Negative emotions are the body’s alarm bell that something needs to change. Either within you or around you. 

In astrological terms, it is the Moon’s job to alert us, and Mercury’s job to figure out what exactly that is. It’s not a matter of acting from your head or your heart — are binaries ever useful for navigating the complexity of reality? — it’s about allowing both to work together and find what needs to change.

Let Mercury translate the Moon’s conflict into words that affirm rather than negate.

An approach that says: I feel hurt and — not but — I know there’s a bigger picture.

Many situations that bring up difficult emotions are never intended to be hurtful or malicious. Perhaps its as small as a last-minute cancelled date, friends not responding to texts, getting cut off in traffic… But rationalising these scenarios should never come at the expense of taking the time to acknowledge our feelings as the deepest most fundamental layer of our understanding. 

Feeling is ultimately what motivates our decisions; not truth, or reason. We can know something to be true, and still emotionally reject it, for what we think is right or most logical (Mercury) is governed by what we need and why (The Moon).

Emotions are essential to knowing the self and its true needs, this is what it means to ground in how we feel. Changing how we react to negative emotions is slow work — requiring repeated reassurance and ritual — but that work will never begin if Mercury doesn’t listen to the Moon.